marcopaulo Posted December 31, 2015 Report Share Posted December 31, 2015 What does the w stand for? I did actually think that - apologies for any offence caused. Least offensive thing you've posted for ages Deacs 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deacs Posted January 3, 2016 Report Share Posted January 3, 2016 Use the Google voice search option on your phone and say "what is an angry dragon" Does it involve Lukaku? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hafnia Posted January 3, 2016 Report Share Posted January 3, 2016 Does it involve Lukaku? Just do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HKR toffee Posted January 4, 2016 Report Share Posted January 4, 2016 Got my lad to see what it is BAD MISTAKE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hafnia Posted January 4, 2016 Report Share Posted January 4, 2016 Got my lad to see what it is BAD MISTAKE Oh no! I'm looking for more of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubecula Posted January 5, 2016 Report Share Posted January 5, 2016 My wife and I went to the Royal Show and one of the first exhibits westopped at was the breeding bulls.. We went up to the first pen andthere was a sign attached that said, ' THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR ' My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs .......Smiled and said, 'Hemated 50 times last year, that's almost once a week.' We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,''THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR' My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, 'WOW~~That's more than twice!a week ! .........You could learn a lot from him.' We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said,in capital letters,'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR' My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,'That's once a day .You could REALLY learn something from this one.' I looked at her and said,'Go over and ask him if it was with the same cow.' My condition has been upgraded from criticalto stable and I should eventually make a full recovery. Deacs 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnh Posted January 26, 2016 Report Share Posted January 26, 2016 A cartoon in the current issue of Private Eye amused me: An elderly couple leaving outpatients. The woman says 'Well that's good. You haven't got dementia you're just a stupid old git'. rubecula and Lowensda 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnh Posted February 1, 2016 Report Share Posted February 1, 2016 Young Indian lad name of Mujibar goes for a job at a call centre in Mumbai. The Head of Personnel says 'give me a sentence with the words green, pink and yellow in. Mujibar says 'the phone goes green, green, I pink up and say yellow Mujibar here'. He got the job. You've probably spoken to him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeO Posted February 1, 2016 Report Share Posted February 1, 2016 Young Indian lad name of Mujibar goes for a job at a call centre in Mumbai. The Head of Personnel says 'give me a sentence with the words green, pink and yellow in. Mujibar says 'the phone goes green, green, I pink up and say yellow Mujibar here'. He got the job. You've probably spoken to him. Ha. Funny enough I had a brilliant chat with an Indian lass at a call centre last week (Talk-Talk). She was really funny, easy to understand and did me a really good deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubecula Posted February 22, 2016 Report Share Posted February 22, 2016 Mary recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home. Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the patio table. Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him.... You know that dishwasher you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money!" She paused for a minute tracing her fingers in the ashes then said, "Remember that car you promised me? Well, I also bought it with the insurance money!" Again, she paused for a few minutes and while tracing her fingers in the ashes she said, "Remember that diamond ring you promised me? I bought that too, with the insurance money!" Finally, still tracing her fingers in the ashes, She said, "Remember that blow job I promised you?" "Here it comes." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnh Posted April 8, 2016 Report Share Posted April 8, 2016 If you ever feel useless........................remember, someones job is to fit indicators on BMW's. Matt, MikeO and rubecula 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubecula Posted June 21, 2018 Report Share Posted June 21, 2018 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnh Posted July 2, 2018 Report Share Posted July 2, 2018 The top three unwritten laws are: 1. 2. 3. rubecula and Matt 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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