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Zoo 2.0

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About Zoo 2.0

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    Anders Limpar

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    Tim Howard
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  1. Zoo 2.0

    West Ham (Home) Sunday September 16th

    Haven't seen an AIDSfest like that in a long time. We were absolutely bullied and played off the park by a West Ham side that everyone has been laughing at. I called it like most before the game too, regardless of past results we were going to drop points here. Pickford was poor, totally at fault for the second goal. Jonjoe Kenny was appalling, demanding that his intentions were checked, verified and signed off before playing a pass, flat around refusing to just kick the fucking thing and give us some rhythm. Kurt Zouma continues to confirm my fears, way out of his depth at Chelsea and an integral part of a Stoke City defence that shipped about 16,000 goals last season - get Yerry in soon. Holgate was alright but mugged off for the first goal. Digne I actually thought did OK, was about a 6/10 so thus our MOTM I suppose. Credit to Schneiderlin for playing under the circumstances, that's all I'll say on the lad today. Gueye's passing was on par with Steven Hawking's for large portions of the game however seemed to settle when Bernard came on alongside him, the Brazilian himself at least trying to create a spark although it was an uphill battle. Walcott was bang average but had Kenny behind offering the square root of fuck all, on the opposite flank DCL had an absolute shocker and I'm disappointed that the Bernard change wasn't for him to come off, how he lasted 90 minutes is beyond me but perhaps it's because he's tall up against West Ham's Empire State defence? Siggy as captain was anonymous although took his goal very well - plus points for that. Up top Tosun was gash, had one good chance and took about fourteen years to take it. Overall, a shocking display in every sense of the word. The Evertonians clapping the lads off at the end left me speechless and are part of the problem. We are still laying the foundations under Silva but if this is the kind of football we are going to be given then we should have just saved a few quid and kept hold of Koeman and/or Allardyce.
  2. Zoo 2.0

    West Ham (Home) Sunday September 16th

    Ademola Lookman on the bench but doesn't seem to have come out to warm-up with the rest of the squad? Hope there is nothing sinister in that. That aside, really pleased with the XI out there. Gueye and Schneiderlin will provide the stability needed for the likes of DCL and Walcott to get at their full-backs. Masuaki is absolutely awful and will get pulled left and right all game if Theo is given the freedom to get at him, the same with Dom if they switch. Hoping for another big performance from Siggy as he's captain and a ton of respect goes to Morgan Schneiderlin, playing as normal so soon after the passing of his father. Despite playing well so far, Tosun desperately needs to start scoring. Fingers crossed today is the day, end the duck. Oh, and it's great to see Lucas Digne statting, get at them!
  3. Zoo 2.0

    Rotherham (Home League Cup) Wednesday August 29th

    A shaky start I thought against inferior opposition but overall a good result in our first game back under the floodlights. I was pleased with the team (just three changes from the one I posted) but was worried that one of them was Maarten Stekelenburg. Despite being an experienced head I just don't have confidence in him at all, especially after he let a low cross go unchallenged across his six-yard box in the opening few minutes which nearly gave me an aneurysm. To his credit he dealt with the high balls well but I'm hoping that in the near future Joao Virginia becomes our No.2. At the back Jonjoe Kenny was brilliant. I don't think he was as MOTM worthy as the radio stations are making out but he was good. Mason Holgate likewise with Lucas Digne, my player of the game on the left. Kurt Zouma I thought was really rusty. Bambi on Ice for the first 45 but seemed to settle down in the second half. Fingers crossed he puts his poor season with Stoke behind him and turns into a solid option for us, to his credit he was much better in the second half but I was worried at the beginning 😖! The midfield was great for me with nobody having a bad game. Tom Davies did what he needed to (great to see him captain) and Gylfi did well with his poachers effort to make it 1-0. Sandro Ramirez had some real moments of magic and just needed a goal to top off his performance, the best of luck to him in Spain as I've just heard he's left for Real Sociedad. Hopefully he manages to get some game time with them and come back a better player as a result. He was absolutely lethal for Malaga so there is a player in there somewhere. Kieron Dowell, despite snatching at a few chances I thought was alright, he really should have made it 4-1 in the last minute but snatched at his chance. Oumar worked his socks off as always but looked off the pace, his 50p head putting many palms to faces when he blazed his header over the bar. Up top DCL was fantastic, a well taken second goal and a great header for the second to put us out of sight. Overall a very professional performance which is pleasing to see after so many changes. We had about three or four higher gears to go into if needed and it proved scoring so quickly after Rotherham did. Zonal Marking continues to be our Achilles heel which is frustrating (I hope Silva allows us to go man-to-man at corners) but time will tell how that one plays out. Onward to Huddersfield and a return of Southampton in the next round! Holgate is 6'0 exactly - are you suggesting that if he was an inch taller you'd be happy with him? Whilst I can see where you're coming from it's not exactly a great comparison looking at their cup final squad. Being 90 minutes away from the trophy of course they're going to take it seriously. Their starting XI against West Brom in the 3rd Round last season included the likes of Mangala (who they then shipped out on loan), Delph and Yaya Toure (who had a frosty relationship with Pep). Don't get me wrong it's still a strong squad but I think that most Premier League clubs in and around the Top 10 take their foot of the gas when it comes to the Carabao Cup. Personally, I think that if we can't beat the likes of Rotherham with a second-string squad then we had deep problems behind the scenes.
  4. Zoo 2.0

    Rotherham (Home League Cup) Wednesday August 29th

    Lucky you, Andy van der Meyde getting a bit merry and lifting a pint glass over his head is the closest I've been to seeing an Everton player lift a cup. I know what you are getting at though. Whilst I think it's important for us to rest players (especially in ties like this) there is a fine balance between selecting yourself out of the competition. That said, our kids should be able to handle Rotherham.
  5. Zoo 2.0

    Referees

    I was surprised that it wasn't given the green light to be honest. Even Spain (where there is a lot of verbal corruption) has implemented it yet we're lagging behind. I'm sure that it will be a feature for the 2019/20 season but I don't know how much more testing they need to see when it was done so well in the World Cup? Not really. Each nation is represented by one referee, the chosen official from England was Mark Clattenburg but he surrendered that place when he moved to the Saudi Arabia. The fact that England wasn't represented in Russia didn't have anything at all to do with the standards in this country.
  6. Zoo 2.0

    Rotherham (Home League Cup) Wednesday August 29th

    I wouldn't trust Stekelenburg to run a bath, nevermind keep a clean sheet for us. Whilst we don't want to burn out Pickford following his World Cup campaign I don't think it'll do him any harm playing on Wednesday and it will be a good chance for him to get a clean sheet under his belt for the first time this season. Zouma will more than likely play in the centre, perhaps alongside Holgate if Keane isn'ttt fit and seeing as Jagielka is banned. Digne on the left would be nice too and would give him a chance to show us what he's got. On the right, Jonjoe Kenny maybe? The middle of the park we can tinker with, happy for Davies to start alongside one of the established two of Gueye and Schneiderlin for consistency. Out wide, maybe some changes with any of Calvert-Lewin, Lookman or Sandro coming in. Dowell in the middle giving Gylfi a rest would be nice to see too, keep him and Bernard fresh for the weekend. Up top, I'd keep Cenk. He's worked hard this season so far but needs a goal, against struggling opposition maybe he can get one in the bag and be off the mark? Pickford Kenny - Holgate - Zouma - Digne Davies - Schneiderlin Sandro - Dowell - Calvert-Lewin Tosun Subs: Stekelenburg, Feeney, Gueye, Lookman, Walcott, Niasse
  7. Zoo 2.0

    Cenk Tosun

    Cenk's defending was brilliant yesterday too, ran his socks off for the time he was on the pitch and from closing down the Southampton back four they had to constantly pump it upfield as opposed to playing out from the back. Last season we would have sat back until they were in our final third however with Tosun running around like a pitbull, teams are having to go route one against us which will be perfect when we have Yerry Mina and/or Michael Keane and Kurt Zouma at the back. Also, massive thumbs up for this too. Doesn't take a lot but means everything to the fans.
  8. Zoo 2.0

    Southampton (Home) Saturday August 18th

    Great first 45 minutes from us, the best I've seen at Goodison in a long time but regardless of what manager we have and the philosophy we use it's always a nail biting finish with Everton isn'ttt it? How we made the second half so difficult I don't know as Southampton were awful and there for the taking. Had we played the second half the same way as the first then we would have strolled to the end but thankfully, that's a minor gripe in what was an enjoyable afternoon at the Old Lady - the first three points in the bag under Marco Silva too! Despite Pickford spilling Cedric's shot I thought Jordan had a good game, especially towards the end when a few balls were being thrown into the box. He gets a bonus thumbs up from me for rattling Mark Hughes with that scissor kick on Danny Ings so for that alone he was in contention to be my MOTM. Further forward, I thought Seamus Coleman linked up well on the right and had a decent afternoon as captain as did Holgate and Keane in the middle (who I'm excited to see alongside Yerry Mina). Baines on the left had another comfortable game, despite being hardly troubled. In the middle, and this isn'ttt me jumping on the bandwagon but I thought Gueye was the only dodgy character out there. His tackling and break-up play was fine however he got caught in possession a few times and some of his mis-placed passes really could have put us in danger, fingers crossed this is something that he can iron out as the season progresses. Schneiderlin on the other hand was brilliant, calm and collected on the ball and bossed the midfield up until his injury - hopefully it's not something that keeps him out of action for too long as he seems to have revolutionised himself under Marco. Richarlison is, well, Richarlison. 3 goals in 2 games, worked his socks off from start to finish despite being booted by Mark Hughes' Stoke Southampton at every opportunity. If he can continue this form throughout the season £50,000,000 will turn out to be a steal, at the moment he's making things happen whenever he gets on the ball with goals being the cherry on top. Theo, despite missing an absolute sitter was my MOTM yesterday. A lovely finish from a well worked free-kick (bonus points to Morgan for the pass) which got us on our way and then a delightful cross to Richarlison for our second. He should have added to his tally with the shot that he dragged wide and so nearly could have had a brace with the goal that was disallowed. A fantastic afternoon for Walcott. Up top, Gylfi and Cenk worked their socks off, a real grafters performance from both of them. I was worried about that myself going into the last few minutes. An equaliser and we go back to the mentality under Martinez where going into the last 10 minutes of a game you just knew we were about to implode. We've got our first win under Marco and we've held out on a one-goal advantage which will work wonders for morale, the defence needs tweaking I'll agree but we've got Mina, Zouma and Digne waiting in the wings. To be fair Roberto did this too but the difference seems to be that we have much more stability with Silva. Yes we were pushing forward for a third but not once did we get caught out with our pants pulled down at the back. Whenever Southampton pumped it long we seemed to have the men in numbers to deal with it. Gomes I think will be a direct replacement for either Gueye or Schneiderlin. He played rather deep in the midfield for Barcelona operating alongside Sergio Busquets so I can see him being something of a deep play-maker for us. He did play on the left-wing for Valencia though (where we he played his best football) although I can't see Richarlison being moved from where he clearly excels.
  9. Zoo 2.0

    Cuco Martina

    Are they going to reimburse the fans that had Cuco Martina shirts printed for this season? Heard both of them are livid.
  10. According to the post on Facebook we will be playing each other either on the 6th or 7th November which I believe is a few days before we play Chelsea at Stamford Bridge (and just after a home game with Brighton). Despite it stating in the piece that Gor Mahia will play the Everton "first team" I would be shocked and annoyed if we risked anyone from the Starting XI in this. I expect a side plucked from the youth department with the odd experienced head such as Stekelenburg and Jagielka to keep things ticking.
  11. Zoo 2.0

    Wolverhampton (Away) Saturday August 11th

    I have never been so optimistic following a 2-2 draw in all my life. I've spent the past week preparing for an absolute slaughtering following our woeful performances in pre-season but to the team and Silva's credit we looked boss yesterday. Up until the goal from Neves we were totally in control and you'd bet your money that we would have added a few more and seen the game out. It's frustrating that we didn't take all three points given that we were so dominant, had one man less than they did and were playing at a club that were having a cup final but there were enough positives in that first game to make me excited for what's to come. Pickford I thought did well when Raul Jiminez broke through late in the day however I agree that he should have done so much better with the free-kick. It was hit magnificently but a strong hand saves that in my opinion, and a Jordan Pickford filled with World Cup testosterone playing against Colombia or Sweden would have saved that. A bit of rustiness slipping through perhaps but on the flip side would Stek have saved it? Nah. Coleman looked brilliant for me all game, I was worried he might have lost it after watching him give a goal away by clattering into Sandro Ramirez in pre-season but to his credit he was brilliant. My only concern is that he got caught out a few times when he bombed forward and they counter-attacked but I suppose that's where the centre-halves kick in and cover. Speaking of them, Keane had arguably his best game in an Everton shirt (I knew there was a player in there somewhere!) as the arrivals of Yerry Mina and Kurt Zouma have perhaps given him the kick up the arse he needs. If he can put in that performance across 38 games we have ourselves a very tidy defender and I'm excited to see what he can bring to the table alongside Mina. As for Jagielka, what a farce. He looked fairly comfortable but that mistake is unforgivable in my opinion. Yes, Neves took the free-kick in a different postcode to where he should have, yes he perhaps made contact with the ball before the player, yes it might seem a bit harsh but take into account the time and space Phil had to control a simple ball and make the pass?! It was absolutely horrendous, the stuff that would be on the blooper reels had it happened to a goalkeeper. Gash in every sense of the word. Baines was spot on, and on this form will be a cracking asset on the left. More praise goes the way of Morgan Schneiderlin for me, he gets some stick from the Everton fanbase but I thought he was great yesterday, cut out attacks and looked really level headed. Silva also seems to have taught him how to pass forwards too which instantly makes me want to hand the gaffer a five-year deal. As with Keane, if we can get those performances over 38 games we'll have a very good option. Gueye I thought was sloppy but not shit by any means. He was one half of the midfield engine that we needed going down to 10 men and for the most part did what he needed to. Walcott was OK, didn't seem to really get that big break but who knows whether he would have been on the scoresheet had Tosun slipped him through rather than shooting - the Turk himself having a poor game in my opinion and never really got going against a fragile and naive Wolves defence. Richarlison was outstanding and the praise I would give to him has already been said ten times over so I'll leave it at that. What a talent. Overall, frustrated not to have won a game that we were so dominant in and following such a horrendous pre-season but I am now filled with optimism for the Southampton game at the weekend. It's only one game, it's only 90 minutes but if these are the foundations of the Marco Silva era then I am happy to get carried away and convince myself that we are winning this league 🤡. Playing for the first time (competitively) in a new position, new team and trying hard to impress. I'd give him a free pass to be honest as he didn't have enough time to get into the swing of things. Judge him after he has 90 minutes of football at left-back. Was fuming with Niasse for this reason though, usually such a workhorse but strolled around for the 10-15 minutes that he was on rather than putting pressure on the Wolves back line. The amount of errors were forced due to closing them down was insane so it therefore got my back up when Oumar's fresh legs wouldn't do anything of the sort. Great attitude from most of the lads though in terms of closing people down (Richarlison especially). Sent off Gary Cahill in last years season opener (in the first-half too if I remember rightly). Pawson is one of them referees that's determined to make a name for himself by grabbing headlines so shite like this is to be expected. For the record I thought the red was probably justified but Craig's overall performance was questionable at best.
  12. Zoo 2.0

    Valencia (Home - Pre Season)

    Not going to kid myself that that was anything other than average. A welcome return to Goodison but I do get the feeling I'll be going there more often than not to come home dissapointed this season, we aren't too bad going forward but defend with the skillset of a Sunday League team with a hangover which is both infuriating and upsetting to see. We are an absolute calamity at times and against Wolves I honestly think we're going to have our pants pulled down. Stekelenburg is woeful, but thankfully Pickford will play next week and our defensive pairing of Keane and Jagielka just doesn't work. I'm convinced that there is a player in there somewhere when it comes to Michael Keane but the last time I saw a decent performance from him he was wearing claret and blue, I find it hard to hurl abuse at Jagielka after what he's done but his legs have totally gone. Why we're heading into the season with a lad closing in on the age of 40 is beyond me, but I guess it's the Everton Way. Leighton Baines, another of the old guard was poor (thank heavens for Digne) and whilst Coleman was alright, rugby tackling Sando Ramirez to gift them the third was one of the biggest face in the wall moments I've had at Goodison. The positives from the game were Theo Walcott who was excellent, Cenk Tosun who was ruthless up top (fantastic finish for the first) and Richarlison who looked bright on the left flank. As I say, we're no Barcelona going forward but I think we'll cause the odd team trouble, its just that we're going to have to score about six or seven to ever be comfortable in a game. Whilst I don't think we'll go down we're not going to challenge for Europe this season and in my opinion it'll be an up and down rollercoaster stopping off at 10th place. The only hope is that we make progress behind the scenes and fix the mess that Koeman, Allardyce and Walsh left behind.
  13. Zoo 2.0

    Rennes

    isn'tttt it time you bought a new keyboard?
  14. Zoo 2.0

    Blackburn

    It's worrying how badly this squad is riddled with AIDS. We can't write off these games as ''pre-season'' and then expect to flick a switch when we come to play Wolves. Even as a number two Stekelenburg is poor. He let Bradley Dack's early effort sail past him (and it was inches wide) and was nowhere near their goal. Mattew Pennington isn'tt going to be a youngster forever, he's 23 and we've got better options - move him on for fucks sake. Ashley Williams is just, well, Ashley Williams. I'd rather cheer on Charles Manson if I'm being perfectly honest. Besic has been class all pre-season but looks dodgy tonight, playing hospital balls as if they're going out of fashion and after bursting onto the scene Tom Davies has suddenly become anonymous under Silva. It's honestly so worrying how average we are, we're being played off the park by a Championship team and will be torn apart at Molenyeux. I get that it's pre-season but it's been four games now. We were shite against Bury, barely turned up against Lille and were beaten by a Porto side that are in disarray. Yeah it's down for me too, which is great as it means I don't have to sit through the shite at Ewood Park.
  15. Zoo 2.0

    Lille

    I think we will get a better idea of where we are at after the Porto game, that was obviously our second string side and whilst it would have bene nice to win (and we should have done with the Klaasen offside) it's good to see some of the kids holding their own against a well drilled Lille side. Porto have problems behind the scenes, they are selling players and not replacing them with fans very angry about money not being spent on the side, they only have one fully fit, established centre-back so I'm expecting a win tomorrow. As for today, Besic stood out as MOTM. I always wonder what would have happened to him if he didn't get that horrendous injury in pre-season two years back, for me he should be in the side every week and hopefully this is the season he establishes himself. He's way too good for the likes of Middlesbrough where he ended up last campaign. Stek I thought was poor, the sooner Pickford is off his jollies the better. Robinson was exciting, Kenny was stable and Williams can do one because I loathe him. Connelly was OK, not bad for his age I suppose. Klaasen did very well and seems to be slowly finding his feet with us, Niasse unfortunately showed us tonight why he will be nothing more than a luxury squad player. Gives 110% every week which I love but should have done so much better with his chances and blazed his penalty so high I'm sure some little green fella on Mars has a headache. A teeny tiny bit underwhelmed, but the real game is tomorrow and there were enough positives to keep me in good spirits.
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