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Jesse_Wray

Why Do Everton Players Have Such Terrible Facial Hair?

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Great to see that Moyes has got the boys back into terrific form. But now I feel he should turn his focus to one of the most pressing issues at the club.

 

What the hell is going on with the shit facial hair?

 

Both Osman and Jags have been guilty of sporting crappy little moustaches in the past - and they're the kind of mos that you're not sure if they're meant to be there or not.

Pienaar and Saha have also maintained fairly suspect facial hair.

 

But Leighton Baines is clearly the worst offender. For the last few weeks I haven't been able to work out if he's making a terrible attempt to grow a beard or if he has lost his razor. The patchy sideburns, upper lip fuzz and general bad coverage on his chin just looks woeful.

 

Perhaps, in the wake of the handball controversy, Baines can take Thierry Henry's spot in the Gillette advertisements. Something needs to be done.

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I can't say that I've noticed Felli's too much (his afro is probably pulling too much focus!).

But I'm totally fine with Arteta's, mainly because he looks as though he can actually grow a decent beard...

efc__1266323659_MA450.jpg

 

Now, although that's just an un-maintained growth after a few days, it's streets ahead of what Baines, Osman and Jags can muster.

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We certainly have a crop of unique players.

 

Jags' dirt stash is embarassing and well...dirty.

 

Mo's fro should never go, neither should his facial hair. I'm a big fan of the rustic look. It says "I have much more important things to worry about, like skipping around "Tiny Baby" Bellamy, chipping Almunia (with highlights no less) and making John Terry look like a statue".

 

They should all grow beards to preserve this wonderful form we're in. I bet they'd do it, Gosling made a comment about team mentality after the win and from the look of things everyone seems like they're all genuinely great friends.

 

We can call them The Beardo Blues

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haha great topic Jesse! I agree with all comments made, but im with jesse in the fact that arteta can actually grow a decent beard! Hibbert had a little go himself not to long ago aswell

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i'd love to join in the banter but at nearly 27 years old and havent shaved in the last week, the most ive been able to muster is a french porn-star moustahe and chin fluff....

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i'd love to join in the banter but at nearly 27 years old and havent shaved in the last week, the most ive been able to muster is a french porn-star moustahe and chin fluff....

I'm not alone! :o

I'm 24 and I can't grow anything resembling facial hair...I've seen old ladies with more formidable mustaches that what I can muster.

 

:(

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I'm not alone! :o

I'm 24 and I can't grow anything resembling facial hair...I've seen old ladies with more formidable mustaches that what I can muster.

 

:(

definately not alone dude. was in Brazil for 2 weeks, forgot my razor. got home with about 5mm long on my chin and french pornstar moustache, random patches on the cheeks and for some weird fuckin reason, it was ginger. i felt rather hard done to, i really want a beard! or at least the option....

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got home with about 5mm long on my chin and french pornstar moustache, random patches on the cheeks...

 

Works for Johnny Depp....he's even gone as far as to live in France to enhance the effect :P .

 

Wonder if he can play right-back :mellow: ?

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