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And Then The Fight Started


rubecula

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And Then the Fight Started...

#1

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive....

So, I took her to a gas station.....

And then the fight started....

*********************************************************

#2

I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $10.95.

Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would

make her look better at night than the cold cream.

And then the fight started....

******************************************************************

#3

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social

Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to

verify my age.

I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.

I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come

back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver

hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security

application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social

Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too'

And then the fight started.....

******************************************************************

#4

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept

staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking

right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober

since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that

long?'

And then the fight started.....

******************************************************************

#5

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and

slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get

soooo stressed and little things just seem funny?

Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!'

So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'

And then the fight started.....

******************************************************************

#6

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order

first.

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

He said, 'Aren't you worried about the Mad Cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And then the fight started.....

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