Ian Posted November 4, 2005 Report Share Posted November 4, 2005 hasnt been many recently and start us off.... jeremy beadle has got a little dick...... ...but on the other hand..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 ............... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 He,s big, ........ he's red his feet stick out the bed peter crouch, peter crouch. . . . ......... . WHO'S YER DADDY. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 benitez walks into the RS dressing room, first thing he spots is steaming pile of turd on the floor, he cant take this "WHOS SHIT ON THE FLOOR!?" benitez exclaims? "Me, but im not so bad in the air" peter crouch replies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 Comedy team........ . . . ........... . . ................Little and Large. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 5, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 heres a joke...... ............... ...................... ............. . . . . . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 this isnt so much a jokes topic, more like a crouch one! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 i thought beadle had one leg longer than the other anyway Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 Kiss my ass you Mo Fo. ..... Its not crouch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 5, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 i thought beadle had one leg longer than the other anyway <{POST_SNAPBACK}> eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest fozzie22 Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 i thought beadle had one leg longer than the other anyway <{POST_SNAPBACK}> No hes got a gammy hand Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 5, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 thats why my joke was funny! he dick is small but on the other hand...(his other hand is small, makin his penis seem larger)....... it doesnt matter, the joke backfired Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zed Posted November 5, 2005 Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 Knock Knock Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 5, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 5, 2005 whoes there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xavier Posted November 6, 2005 Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 Q: Did you hear that the British Post Office has just recalled their latest stamps? A: Well, they had photos of Manchester United players on them - folk couldn't figure out which side to spit on. Q. What do you call a Manchester United fan with half a brain? A: Gifted. Q: How many Man United fans does it take to change a light bulb? A: 560,001. That is 1 to change it, 60,000 to say they've been changing it for years and 500,000 to buy the replica kit. Michael Barrymore has offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker because he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down. Q: Why can't you get a cup of tea at Old Trafford? A: All the mugs are on the field and all the cups are at Anfield. A couple were going through the traumatic throes of a divorce when the subject of the custody of their 4-year-old became the contended point. The judge said that since the lad's future was at stake he would like to see the young boy alone in chambers. Once in chambers, the judge asked if the boy understood what was happening. The 4-year said, "Yes sir, my mammy and daddy won't be living together any more." "That's correct my boy" said the judge "And would you like to live with mammy?" "No" replied the boy. "Why not?" asked the judge. "Because she beats me!" said the lad. "Hmm" said the judge, "Would you like to live with your daddy then?" Again the boy answered "No". Again the judge asked "Why not?" And the little lad replied "Because he beats me too." "Well then, who do you want to live with?" queried the judge. The young boy quickly replied "Everton, sir." "Why Everton FC?" Asked the puzzled judge. "Because they don't beat anybody" the boy simply replied. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 6, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 yeah, good one that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zed Posted November 6, 2005 Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 whoes there <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I wanna p.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 6, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 i wanna p who? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Total Toffee Posted November 6, 2005 Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 A couple were going through the traumatic throes of a divorce when the subject of the custody of their 4-year-old became the contended point. The judge said that since the lad's future was at stake he would like to see the young boy alone in chambers. Once in chambers, the judge asked if the boy understood what was happening. The 4-year said, "Yes sir, my mammy and daddy won't be living together any more." "That's correct my boy" said the judge "And would you like to live with mammy?" "No" replied the boy. "Why not?" asked the judge. "Because she beats me!" said the lad. "Hmm" said the judge, "Would you like to live with your daddy then?" Again the boy answered "No". Again the judge asked "Why not?" And the little lad replied "Because he beats me too." "Well then, who do you want to live with?" queried the judge. The young boy quickly replied "Everton, sir." "Why Everton FC?" Asked the puzzled judge. "Because they don't beat anybody" the boy simply replied. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> If that was bout Liverpool or Man utd it wud be funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zed Posted November 6, 2005 Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 i wanna p who? <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Well, go the toilet then Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bill Posted November 6, 2005 Report Share Posted November 6, 2005 oh dear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 David Hasselhoff went into his local bar and marched right up to Fred the barman. "Listen Fred ive been doing some thinking and i eh, well i dont want you guys calling me Dave or Mr Hasselhoff any more. You know am sick of it. I just wanna be known as The Hoff. Can you do that for me for me Fred?" "Just Hoff then huh?" "Absolutley" repiies David "Sure, no hassle" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 i think thats very funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoldfishMemory Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 Q: Did you hear that the British Post Office has just recalled their latest stamps?A: Well, they had photos of Manchester United players on them - folk couldn't figure out which side to spit on. Q. What do you call a Manchester United fan with half a brain? A: Gifted. Q: How many Man United fans does it take to change a light bulb? A: 560,001. That is 1 to change it, 60,000 to say they've been changing it for years and 500,000 to buy the replica kit. Michael Barrymore has offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker because he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down. Q: Why can't you get a cup of tea at Old Trafford? A: All the mugs are on the field and all the cups are at Anfield. A couple were going through the traumatic throes of a divorce when the subject of the custody of their 4-year-old became the contended point. The judge said that since the lad's future was at stake he would like to see the young boy alone in chambers. Once in chambers, the judge asked if the boy understood what was happening. The 4-year said, "Yes sir, my mammy and daddy won't be living together any more." "That's correct my boy" said the judge "And would you like to live with mammy?" "No" replied the boy. "Why not?" asked the judge. "Because she beats me!" said the lad. "Hmm" said the judge, "Would you like to live with your daddy then?" Again the boy answered "No". Again the judge asked "Why not?" And the little lad replied "Because he beats me too." "Well then, who do you want to live with?" queried the judge. The young boy quickly replied "Everton, sir." "Why Everton FC?" Asked the puzzled judge. "Because they don't beat anybody" the boy simply replied. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Fu*k Off Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeO Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 David Hasselhoff went into his local bar and marched right up to Fred the barman. "Listen Fred ive been doing some thinking and i eh, well i dont want you guys calling me Dave or Mr Hasselhoff any more. You know am sick of it. I just wanna be known as The Hoff. Can you do that for me for me Fred?" "Just Hoff then huh?" "Absolutley" repiies David "Sure, no hassle" <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Really did make me laugh out loud Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 its good isnt it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 He was @ Sydney Int airport recently handing out..." DONT HASSLE THE HOFF" BADGES..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 i think a pic of the hoff is in order..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 10, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 Oh no Ian...Im gonna have to get Hoffing now..."Hoffmania reaches ToffeeTalk"..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted November 11, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 11, 2005 the hoff has landed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xavier Posted November 11, 2005 Report Share Posted November 11, 2005 Fu*k Off <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Thats just bitter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Posted November 11, 2005 Report Share Posted November 11, 2005 Rather Bitter..........................Than Twisted...!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoldfishMemory Posted November 12, 2005 Report Share Posted November 12, 2005 Thats just bitter <{POST_SNAPBACK}> No i'm just bored with your stupid RS attitude, get a life and find a hobby that doesnt involve Everton and maybe you will be a bit happier! I still think your a bird Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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