Jump to content

Down In The Pub..


Recommended Posts

in a rough pub when a well-dressed man enters,

orders a beer and sits on a stool at the bar.


The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the



Matt: - I reckon he's an accountant.

James: - No way - he's a stockbroker.

Matt: - He ain't no stockbroker ! A stockbroker wouldn't come in



The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer

gets the better of Matt and he makes for the toilet.


On entering the toilet he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal.

Curiosity and the several beers get the better of the builder...



Matt: - Scuse me... no offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering

what you do for a living?


Suit: - No offence taken ! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession!


Matt: - Oh! What's that then ?


Suit: - I'll try to explain by example... Do you have a goldfish at



Matt: - Er... mmm... well yeah, I do as it happens!


Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in

a pond. Which is it?


Matt: - It's in a pond!


Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large

garden then?


Matt: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!


Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you

have a large garden then you have a large house?


Matt: - As it happens I've got a five bedroom house... built it



Suit: - Well given that you've built a five bedroom house it is

logical to assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and

that you are quite probably married?


Matt: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children


Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually

active with your wife on a regular basis?


Matt: - Yep! Four nights a week!


Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not

masturbate very often?


Matt: - Me? Never


Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!


Matt: - How's that then?


Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told

you about your sex life !


Matt: - I see! That's pretty impressive... thanks mate!



Both leave the toilet and Matt returns to his mate.



James: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he



Matt: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!


James: - What's that then?


Matt: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?


James: - Nope


Matt: - Well then, you're a w*nker.



Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Create New...