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Man Uniteds dressing room just before the kick off in the derby...'right lads i want 110% from you today against this blue shite! Remember the bastards did us on the munich anniversary and if we dont win those cockney bastards chelsea will have 6 points on us! Now i don't care if you kick, punch or headbutt your way to victory you must win this one today! Good luck lads!' Then Fergie walks in and says 'thanks ref i'll take it from here.'

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