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The Secret Thread


Guest efctaxi

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Guest efctaxi

Try these :P

 

 

Hung Chow calls into work and says, 'Hey, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work.'

The boss says, 'You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this,

I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that.

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again.

'I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon........ You got nice house

 

 

A man is in a queue at Tesco and sees this busty blonde staring at him, he can't believe she is staring at him, then she starts waving.

'Excuse me do I know you?' he asks. 'Yes I think you are the father of one of my kids' she says.

 

The man thinks back and remembers his one act of infidelity and says 'Are you the bird I shagged on my stag night, whilst your mate whipped me and your other mate stuck a brush up my arse?'

 

'No' she replies 'I'm your son's English teacher!'

 

 

A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years.

He breaks into a house to look for money and guns.

Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him toa chair.

While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict gets on top

of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he is in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: "Listen,this guy is an escaped convict.

Look at his clothes! He has Probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years.

I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain...do whatever he tells you.

Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous.

If he gets angry, he could kill us both. Be strong, honey I love you!"

His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear.

He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline.

I told him it was in the bathroom.

Be strong honey. I love you, too!

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Hung Chow calls into work and says, 'Hey, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work.'

The boss says, 'You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this,

I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that.

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again.

'I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon........ You got nice house

 

 

A man is in a queue at Tesco and sees this busty blonde staring at him, he can't believe she is staring at him, then she starts waving.

'Excuse me do I know you?' he asks. 'Yes I think you are the father of one of my kids' she says.

 

The man thinks back and remembers his one act of infidelity and says 'Are you the bird I shagged on my stag night, whilst your mate whipped me and your other mate stuck a brush up my arse?'

 

'No' she replies 'I'm your son's English teacher!'

 

 

A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years.

He breaks into a house to look for money and guns.

Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him toa chair.

While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict gets on top

of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he is in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: "Listen,this guy is an escaped convict.

Look at his clothes! He has Probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years.

I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain...do whatever he tells you.

Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous.

If he gets angry, he could kill us both. Be strong, honey I love you!"

His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear.

He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline.

I told him it was in the bathroom.

Be strong honey. I love you, too!

 

 

 

That didn't take long Taxi! ;)

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