Blue_Bird

woo hoo

John, who was in financial difficulty, walked into a church and started to pray. ''Listen God,'' John said. ''I know I haven't been perfect but I really need to win the lottery. I don't have a lot of money. Please help me out.'' He left the church, a week went by, and he hadn't won the lottery, so he walked into a synagogue. ''Come on, God,'' he said. ''I really need this money. My mom needs surgery and I have bills to pay. Please let me win the lottery.'' He left the synagogue, a week went by, and he didn't win the lottery. So, he went to a mosque and started to pray again. ''You're starting to disappoint me, God,'' he said. ''I've prayed and prayed. If you just let me win the lottery, I'll be a better person. I don't have to win the jackpot, just enough to get me out of debt. I'll give some to charity, even. Just let me win the lottery.'' John thought this did it, so he got up and walked outside. The clouds opened up and a booming voice said, ''John, buy a fucking lottery ticket.'' BB

Lady goes into a hardware store looking for a hinge. The man says' "Do you wanna screw for the hinge?" She says' "No, but I'll suck your dick for that toaster!!" BB

Cheers for the welcome BB

Where shall I start with the artists I have seen hmmm I used to love Deacon Blue and have seen them 4 times I think Anyone remember the John Lennon Concert at the Pier Head - I was at that (can't remember the line up tho) Most recently tho I have seen: U2 Coldplay Madonna snoop Dog scissor sistors Annie Lennox The Killers Paul McCartney Robbie Williams & PINK FLOYD -(something I'll never forget ) (plus many more) All courtesy of the fabulous Live 8 concert I went to in July BB

Was sent this one as a text Cabbie says to a nun in his cab My fantasy is to be sucked off by a nun She says OK but you must be Catholic and Single Cabbie says he is so nun sucks him. He starts to cry Forgive me sister - I have sinned - I'm married and I'm Jewish Thats Ok says the nun - I'm Kevin and on way to Fancy Dress BB

They were fab, I used to think I was quite good at stuff like that but I failed on them all. The numbers one is great. BB

Sorry! I didn't have any probs signing up when I joined in August with this name though. Is it gonna be a prob? BB

Kevin McNaughton - he's a new one on me So have we been linked with him? BB

Given the money available I'd be putting it on Nugent BB

Thanks BB

PMSL Very Funny Indeed I wonder how many other clubs would like to put their manager up for grabs on ebay BB

Hi there, Been dipping in and out of the forum for a while now, like reading all the views and chat that gets posted. Would like to try to get a bit more involved so please bare with while I become aquainted with the board BB

I think it will be 2-1 BT & Ossie for us BB

2.5 mill for Bent is fab! Same as everyone I'm wondering who Moyes has lined up to come in as replacement BB

Testing testing 1,2,3, This is my first ever post so fingers crossed it works