iggy Posted July 19, 2006 Report Share Posted July 19, 2006 "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline." If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y & c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0 0 0. If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy to talk to you." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebluenose Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 that is class Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mac Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 I bloody loved that. Nice one Iggy ATB Mac Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoldfishMemory Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. 39881[/snapback] Look theres one for the fish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 good stuff Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tara Mac Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 Look theres one for the fish 40128[/snapback] i think ther is one for all of you boys. T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romey 1878 Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 Another good one from you, you're the joke man now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adams Posted July 20, 2006 Report Share Posted July 20, 2006 like it mate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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