SimonButtle Posted February 17, 2012 Report Share Posted February 17, 2012 Hey TT, I have spent the last few months undergoing a series of long assessments and IQ tests and psychotherapy sessions all which have amounted from years of self abuse and bad things happening around me. I have battles constantly with myself knowing im doing the wrong thing, but a voice in my head will make me still do it i have suffered from vivid hallucinations such as sitting at the local station and watching the platform move instead of the train, and having a huge panic attack from it, i have cowered in the corner of rooms thinking members of my own family want to kill me. I have fought with this since a teenager and last year i could take no more from it, and today i was finally diagnosed with a Schizotypal Personality Disorder. I am finally happy that i have some idea what is going on, but it's a big thing to have on top of already having epilepsy, it can be treated with medication and hopefully i can function normally and eventually get another job at some point. I know i have a tendancy to go off on one at some points, but seriously guys i can't help it, sometimes i just can't control what i say or do, and now i have a doctors note to prove it. I now await to see what meds i will be prescribed, some sort of anti-psychotic i expect nothing to heavy i hope as i want to work again at some point. This is a massive new chapter in my life and today is like starting all over again in some respects, i don't know what the future will hold tbh, at the moment i need to just get control of my head, but wish me luck anyway. anyone who wants to know more: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizotypal_personality_disorder Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoo Posted February 17, 2012 Report Share Posted February 17, 2012 I'm really happy to hear that you're on the mend and that you are feeling a lot happier with yourself. Since being on this forum you have never shown a negative attitude and I value you as a really good member. I'm sure everyone on ToffeeTalk (including myself) will offer you whatever help they can whenever you need it. I myself live with a problem called Gilbert's Syndrome which is a condition which is pretty similar to Jaundis. If I don't drink enough water in a day I'll get really bad stomach cramps which force me to sit or lie down with pain. I remember before I was diagnosed I thought I had some form of killer-disease and one night I had a really bad attack where I coulden't control the bottom half of my body, my legs were shaking and I honestly felt as if I was going to die at the age of 16, I've never been so scared so I can relate to what you had been going through. Being diagnosed has allowed me to feel better about myself and I'm glad you feel the same. Best Wishes for the future mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Regulator Posted February 17, 2012 Report Share Posted February 17, 2012 I knew someone who suffered from schizophrenia in uni and although I hadn't know him very long, tried to help. It is a very difficult illness to understand and even harder to control, but when he was on medication you couldn't tell, either that he was on it or that he was schizophrenic. he was a really nice guy, when he stopped taking the medication he had to leave uni after some quite bizarre incidents, but it was clear that with help things like this can be conquered. I hope that you get the help you need because sometimes it's just about owning the illness, not letting it control you, and taking a positive attitude with you wherever you go. I hope that things get better for you mate, I'm sure I'm not alone in that wish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimonButtle Posted February 17, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2012 Hey TT, I have spent the last few months undergoing a series of long assessments and IQ tests and psychotherapy sessions all which have amounted from years of self abuse and bad things happening around me. I have battles constantly with myself knowing im doing the wrong thing, but a voice in my head will make me still do it i have suffered from vivid hallucinations such as sitting at the local station and watching the platform move instead of the train, and having a huge panic attack from it, i have cowered in the corner of rooms thinking members of my own family want to kill me. I have fought with this since a teenager and last year i could take no more from it, and today i was finally diagnosed with a Schizotypal Personality Disorder. I am finally happy that i have some idea what is going on, but it's a big thing to have on top of already having epilepsy, it can be treated with medication and hopefully i can function normally and eventually get another job at some point. I know i have a tendancy to go off on one at some points, but seriously guys i can't help it, sometimes i just can't control what i say or do, and now i have a doctors note to prove it. I now await to see what meds i will be prescribed, some sort of anti-psychotic i expect nothing to heavy i hope as i want to work again at some point. This is a massive new chapter in my life and today is like starting all over again in some respects, i don't know what the future will hold tbh, at the moment i need to just get control of my head, but wish me luck anyway. anyone who wants to know more: http://en.wikipedia....nality_disorder If Anyone Is Wondering Why I Have Chosen To Share This, It Is Because I Have Been Encouraged To Open Up More, So Im Trying To Encourage Myself To Open Up And Face The Problems That Have Been Eating Away At Me All These Years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimonButtle Posted February 17, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2012 Thank you for the kind words guys, i will have to get a routine for it and be able to manage it properly, it will take time i know, it will take time, but that i have a lot of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeO Posted February 17, 2012 Report Share Posted February 17, 2012 Good luck to you Si....no stigma attached to mental health issues these days (from anyone with any sense), had a few issues myself over the years. Glad you've been diagnosed mate and hope they get your meds sorted soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dalziel Kane Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 I'm undergoing counselling myself at the moment, It's mainly due to agression and depression Had another session today, so I can appreciate there are others out there who would maybe in need of some assistance or a helping hand. It can be a lonely planet sometimes so it's good there are guys out there who are trained and you can sit down and have a discussions without fear of apathy or flippant attitudes Prisoner is not alone in all this, it can be a struggle sometimes just to get by on a weekly basis or even routine events, there's no shame in owning up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romey 1878 Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Good luck with it all mate, I'm sure you'll get it all under control and be happier for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimonButtle Posted February 18, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 I'm undergoing counselling myself at the moment, It's mainly due to agression and depression Had another session today, so I can appreciate there are others out there who would maybe in need of some assistance or a helping hand. It can be a lonely planet sometimes so it's good there are guys out there who are trained and you can sit down and have a discussions without fear of apathy or flippant attitudes Prisoner is not alone in all this, it can be a struggle sometimes just to get by on a weekly basis or even routine events, there's no shame in owning up That is something i have a lot of myself mate, i have anger issues and the most hurtful thing is that the anger side only ever manifests itself around my family, who are the people i should be able to rely on the most, depression is something ive only ever had in fluctuations but i lost a friend 6 years ago to it as she suffered badly and could take no more from it. Im glad that people are accepting mental health issues more now, i used to work in the mental health industry as a support worker and i had to quit the job due to seeing to many similarities between myself and the people i was looking after, i got to see how difficult it was for those with "inside issues" that saying about how "Just because i look well on the outside does not mean i am on the inside" rings so true, and finally people are starting to see that, i know at the moment there are a series of adverts on tv raising awareness on mental health, and i really like the idea of being involved with mental health awareness in some aspect or other, lots to do and think about anyway. Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hafnia Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Best of luck to you pris, sorry to hear about your struggles, but very inspiring to see you be up front up like this. I wish you well mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimonButtle Posted February 18, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Best of luck to you pris, sorry to hear about your struggles, but very inspiring to see you be up front up like this. I wish you well mate. Thanks, im being encouraged to be upfront about things, and bring them out in the open, it's the only way of dealing with them, otherwise they will just carry on eating away at me and get worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hafnia Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Thanks, im being encouraged to be upfront about things, and bring them out in the open, it's the only way of dealing with them, otherwise they will just carry on eating away at me and get worse. Amazing how crutches, scars, plasters are used as badges of bravery - yet mental health issues can be viewed as taboo despite their clear prescence in society. Fair play to stan collymore, doing some exceptional work in trying to break down that wall. We are all human, all vulnerable and all need support. Congrats on your brave step. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue 250 Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Keep talking mate, it will really help.The correct people and the medication are a major step to your recovery.Mental health issues are as real as a broken leg, and are waiting just around the corner for us all. I've written two long posts in responce to what you have written......and lost them both as the internet has crashed on me!!...so I'm having an anger issue with my fuc%ing pc at the moment. When I can actually get more than a few words typed, I'll get back to you. Good luck, your on the right track now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcopaulo Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 good luck man...big step for ya and you know we all will help anyway we can...comic relief perhaps? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowensda Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 (edited) good luck man...big step for ya and you know we all will help anyway we can...comic relief perhaps? We're here for you Pris if you ever need to talk, so feel free to logon and let it out and if you're looking for comic relief...don't go to Marco Edited February 18, 2012 by tenaciousj Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcopaulo Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 cunt off nobby!! i'm funny!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romey 1878 Posted February 19, 2012 Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 cunt off nobby!! i'm funny!! Looking? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimonButtle Posted February 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 (edited) yeah i know it's a good place on here tbh, because everyone is mature and sensible and im not likely to ever meet in person anyone on here, so i do feel comfortable talking about things on here, it's a good place to let things out, better than Facebook, the last time i did anything like that it caused A LOT of trouble!!! Edited February 19, 2012 by theprisoner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcopaulo Posted February 19, 2012 Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 Looking? har har har...twat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romey 1878 Posted February 19, 2012 Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 har har har...twat Coming from you I'll take that as a compliment . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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