rubecula

A woman goes to her priest one day and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest inquired. "They say 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'" "That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed. Then he thought for a moment. "You know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots whom I have taught to pray and read the bible. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Francis and Job. My parrots can teach your parrots to praise and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying ...that phrase... in no time." "Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution." The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage, holding rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them. After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: "Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?" There was a stunned silence. Finally, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, "Put the beads away, Francis, our prayers have been answered!"

speculation is fine but do not get carried away, to me he is already irrelevant , he no longer plays for us and probably never will again unlike Wayne Rooney did.

Left or right makes no difference to me Mike, I would really like to see a journalist not be a bigot when interviewing a politician, instead of forcing the issue, let them fuck it up themselves.

does the wife know? yes - you have to spend it on her, no - you are right (free money)

still not watched game of thrones, saw the new doctor start with Bradley Walsh got to be honest and say he is no Bernard Cribbins is he? but so saying I do not like pandering to pc and/or gay rights. I do not care if they are men, women, gay, straight or bestial. it is none of my business so the sooner they stop pushing it in our faces the better I will like it. maybe the next doctor an be an alien creature such as the silurians or the sea devils. after all they are supposed to be from earth too. and the doctor does like to look earthly.

Some "could be worse off" under universal credit, admits Esther McVey - but Work and Pensions Secretary says benefits changes are helping more people into work maybe I am going deaf or daft but I never heard her say that, I heard that people are going into work and therefore will not need the same level of benefits not the same thing at all. I really wish journalists would post/print/broadcast accurately, if they did that we would not be in the political death throes that brexit has put some people in and we may all agree on whether we should remain. we need good honest reporting and screw political alliances between parties and media.

I like most comedy stars no I am not sure why either. I like mr Kenneth Williams. John who do you like ?

Round the Horne was brilliant to listen to, as was Hello Cheeky and in a milder way Much Binding in the Marsh

if we could get hi for a bag of crisps I ould say Neymar, but I think he would be priced too highly. personally I think we should try to get a good English (or at least a British) striker in if we did that we would not have to worry about any players going away on obscure internationals midway through the season. we would always get a break from club competition with that scenario.

so true they get a stadium in Britain …. AND actually allow the patrons to get used to it...…

bloody hysterical Mike

perhaps it is a long term to make a substantial profit and not necessarily before we move in?

better chance than me I put us down for 22-0 with Darracott as first to score. lol

I will soon get me back in the groove

after this game I will be back to posting my pwn scores with grateful thanks to Matt for keeping me on the boil

It seems strange to go away fpr a few weeks and to come back to the same old arguments. ok I am not going to join in any more as we have all made our points. But before I vanish I want to point out something. no matter what you think about brexit be it good or bad, remember we are the first nation to leave, so nobody can say what will happen (they may believe what they say but a forecast is not a prediction) so those who say it will be bad for us or those who say it will be good for us may very well be totally wrong.

no we have never won at the emirates

my new car is Kak yes indeed it id it's reg, but it is also red in colour lol

eh? who? never vote for Corbyn or Boris and nobody has voted for May

lol I know mate lol

never tell him the result let him learn for himself. He may think you ate calling him a jinx he may be a loyal royal blue toffee all his life then.

how can he return? he has not made his debut yet. (or has he?)

jesus man don't bring the president Fart into this ffs What is wrong with you?

https://www.nsno.co.uk/everton-news/2018/09/moyes-my-everton-could-have-challenged-for-the-premier-league/