marcopaulo

Meet and mash
 
What's not to like

You stealing my material now? Jesus. Only 1 page ago.

You utter bastard

You utter bastard

A man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?" The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. A sound unlike anything he's ever heard before. The Sirens that nearly seduced Odysseus into crashing his ship comes to his mind. He doesn't sleep that night. He tosses and turns trying to figure out what could possibly be making such a seductive sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk." Distraught, the man is forced to leave. Years later, after never being able to forget that sound, the man goes back to the monastery and pleads for the answer again. The monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk." The man says, "If the only way I can find out what is making that beautiful sound is to become a monk, then please, make me a monk." The monks reply, "You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of grains of sand. When you find these answers, you will have become a monk." The man sets about his task. After years of searching he returns as a gray- haired old man and knocks on the door of the monastery. A monk answers. He is taken before a gathering of all the monks. "In my quest to find what makes that beautiful sound, I traveled the earth and have found what you asked for: By design, the world is in a state of perpetual change. Only God knows what you ask. All a man can know is himself, and only then if he is honest and reflective and willing to strip away self deception." The monks reply, "Congratulations. You have become a monk. We shall now show you the way to the mystery of the sacred sound." The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is beyond that door." The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man is given the key to the stone door and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. And so it went that he needed keys to doors of emerald, pearl and diamond. Finally, they come to a door made of solid gold. The sound has become very clear and definite. The monks say, "This is the last key to the last door." The man is apprehensive to no end. His life's wish is behind that door! With trembling hands, he unlocks the door, turns the knob, and slowly pushes the door open. Falling to his knees, he is utterly amazed to discover the source of that haunting and seductive sound...... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... But, of course, I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk

Apart from that shite ridiculous ball near the end when he should have kept it on the ground..didn't do anything too wrong I don't reckon..whole lot were shite

Really hate pardews face
 
Not his fault..but I just want to twat him

I hate parties, surprises, crowds, fuss, family do's and just fun in general.
 
 
My invite in the post?
 
Hope all goes well

You're not the first person to say that haha

You're not the first person to say that haha

It's OK now, I've changed to link to an alternative source like I said.
 
I think he'd be a signing we could bank on, we should cheque him out.

Don't know why this came from the depths of my memory today. Back in the 1990's I had the pleasure of an hours chat with Henry Cooper, just me and him. He told me many stories about his career, some very funny. I remember one about when Henry and his twin brother George (also a heavyweight) were being driven through London in manager Jim Wicks car. Jim Wicks cut up a taxi driver who forced them to a stop. The taxi driver, all 5ft 8in of him, got out and ran aggressively towards them. Henry said he and George got out to calm things down and the taxi driver, who obviously didn't recognise them, said ' you are only brave cos there's two of yer'.

Sorry to correct you but you never put unfortunately before Niasse went nowhere!

Chelsea getting spanked

And tell ross and gerry is OK to shoot

And tell ross and gerry is OK to shoot

yeah they are awfully cute. i fix things around the house (simple things, usually with as screwdriver) and take my son with me to watch and learn. He now thinks i can fix anything. We usually drive past these fountains on the way to the pool and one weekend they weren't on, he said "papa fountains are broken, get your screwgriper (how he pronounces it) and fix it?" . i was so proud

Continued copy and paste posts

Isn't the league cup like an extra 4 games now? Hardly alters the course of the seasons fixtures! How can people not be arsed about losing in a cup game..beyond me

At the end of the day
So I turned round and said
 
Hate these phrases
 
Also..nosey bastards..fuckin rubber necking cunts

I just cant get my head around people not being bothered about us losing any game of football so its a totally alien conception to me that anybody wouldn't want to win a trophy

You didn't give anyone off here for a reference did you?

I like him..unfair to judge..looked so uncomfortable

I like him..unfair to judge..looked so uncomfortable

Ten..you're a cunt
 
 
Thanks everyone else though
 
 
I can see noise