Avinalaff

Go kick a snow man over you miserable git.

2-2 final result.
 
That will do us.

Prematch rotines?
 
12:30pm, we'll all congregate down aisle 31 of the local Asda looking for the cheapest case of beer we can find. There's no point going earlier as the Fantasy Footy team has to be picked before 11.30 and if we don't get the super 6 predictions in before kick off we might kick ourselves.
 
At the till, we'll normally eye the bird up on the checkout and see what she's doing after the match, just incase the lads need a curry making like, or there's tidying up to do, and then we'll stock up on the fags n a few scratch cards just in case we win, in which case we'll nip back in and get one of them big screen tellies like from the back.
 
Then we'll normally sing a few songs on the way to Big Bazzers house, you know the sort of thing, 'Pet shop boys' is right popular at the mo, but the high bits have us coughin a bit. We normally have a quick check in the lecky cupboard as we knock, as the tight c*nts always on his last pound, and then it's a mad race for the single seater, as the sofa's got it's middle cushion missing.
 
This is normally the time we're all at our most nervous. The tension builds as the fat fucker turns his computer on, and we all sit waiting as his Windows 93 takes all fuckin afternoon to boot up. Once we get up and running, a quick Google for the local Kebab house is the norm, followed by a quick stock take on the beer, as Tezza normally snides a few in the bog when no buggers looking.
 
Next, it's normally a very strict procedure like:
 
Sopcast - check ; Veetle - check; Sound - check; bog roll - check; half time porno - check; Kenwright Voodoo doll - check.
 
Then, "bing bong", it's the delivery lad from the Kebab shop. Everyone chips in except Big Bazzer, which is a bit of a cheek like, as you wanna see the fat fucker eat, but it's his gaff, so no groans. We normally give him a couple of bent twenties and tell him to keep the change, and then it's countdown to kick off.
 
We boot Chezzer off Toffeetalk, and it's show time. Find match, Bloodzeed a go go, and then the whistle blows. You can hear a pin drop. Then some soft c*nt turns the volume up, an it's just like a real game. Infact, if you squint yer eyes a bit you can just about pretend your there.
 
Half time's where it's at like. No queueing for pizza. 2nd crate of Stella cracked open, and a spliff in the ash tray. That daft tw@t Gary Neville starts on about how Suarez is a dirty rotten bastard an before ye can say "You're spot on Gary" Bazzers got the smut show on with a few phone cam vids of him and his tart in a Skegness back alley. Fuck me, she looks like a Blob fish with zits, so it's quite a relief when the second half starts.
 
Match ends, and we've fuckin drawn abastardgain.
 
While there's still a bit of lecky left, we normally jump onto the Everton forum. Normally starts with "Just got back from ythe match" before tellin Moyes exactly where he went wrong, and moanin that we've not signed no fucker.
 
All a case of how long the beer lasts then, before lookin out the window to see if the Asda birds turned up.
 
It's not like that every week mind. Sometimes we're skint, and it's a case of staying in and putting the radio on in the shed, but all in all, we're proper fans us, n don't you Brentford boo boys forget it.

Prematch rotines?
 
12:30pm, we'll all congregate down aisle 31 of the local Asda looking for the cheapest case of beer we can find. There's no point going earlier as the Fantasy Footy team has to be picked before 11.30 and if we don't get the super 6 predictions in before kick off we might kick ourselves.
 
At the till, we'll normally eye the bird up on the checkout and see what she's doing after the match, just incase the lads need a curry making like, or there's tidying up to do, and then we'll stock up on the fags n a few scratch cards just in case we win, in which case we'll nip back in and get one of them big screen tellies like from the back.
 
Then we'll normally sing a few songs on the way to Big Bazzers house, you know the sort of thing, 'Pet shop boys' is right popular at the mo, but the high bits have us coughin a bit. We normally have a quick check in the lecky cupboard as we knock, as the tight c*nts always on his last pound, and then it's a mad race for the single seater, as the sofa's got it's middle cushion missing.
 
This is normally the time we're all at our most nervous. The tension builds as the fat fucker turns his computer on, and we all sit waiting as his Windows 93 takes all fuckin afternoon to boot up. Once we get up and running, a quick Google for the local Kebab house is the norm, followed by a quick stock take on the beer, as Tezza normally snides a few in the bog when no buggers looking.
 
Next, it's normally a very strict procedure like:
 
Sopcast - check ; Veetle - check; Sound - check; bog roll - check; half time porno - check; Kenwright Voodoo doll - check.
 
Then, "bing bong", it's the delivery lad from the Kebab shop. Everyone chips in except Big Bazzer, which is a bit of a cheek like, as you wanna see the fat fucker eat, but it's his gaff, so no groans. We normally give him a couple of bent twenties and tell him to keep the change, and then it's countdown to kick off.
 
We boot Chezzer off Toffeetalk, and it's show time. Find match, Bloodzeed a go go, and then the whistle blows. You can hear a pin drop. Then some soft c*nt turns the volume up, an it's just like a real game. Infact, if you squint yer eyes a bit you can just about pretend your there.
 
Half time's where it's at like. No queueing for pizza. 2nd crate of Stella cracked open, and a spliff in the ash tray. That daft tw@t Gary Neville starts on about how Suarez is a dirty rotten bastard an before ye can say "You're spot on Gary" Bazzers got the smut show on with a few phone cam vids of him and his tart in a Skegness back alley. Fuck me, she looks like a Blob fish with zits, so it's quite a relief when the second half starts.
 
Match ends, and we've fuckin drawn abastardgain.
 
While there's still a bit of lecky left, we normally jump onto the Everton forum. Normally starts with "Just got back from ythe match" before tellin Moyes exactly where he went wrong, and moanin that we've not signed no fucker.
 
All a case of how long the beer lasts then, before lookin out the window to see if the Asda birds turned up.
 
It's not like that every week mind. Sometimes we're skint, and it's a case of staying in and putting the radio on in the shed, but all in all, we're proper fans us, n don't you Brentford boo boys forget it.

Twice in one weekend.

They'll only be content when we've all stopped posting mate.

That kind of defeats the purpose of the motm thread.
 
Our ancestors died so we could vote, but feel free to vote for underperformers if that's your thing.

Laid back and not enough purpose.
 
Very little creativity, and lazy movement. If we want something out of the season we need to work harder. It's the kind of game where the opposition could nick it, so time to find the net, and be more clinical.
 
Only Coleman has my applauds.

That's it then.
 
We're now kicked out of the FA cup, pending an enquiry.
 
 
http://www.bbc.co.uk...Everton_forfeit

Warnock is one of my favourite managers, and is a hugely passionate man.
 
Absolutely perfect for Ross, and if Moyes ever leaves, we can have NW as replacement.

The simple truth is that if we want European football we need to be winning games from here on in and hope others drop.
 
If we don't, we won't.

Ha ha, you can't remember your childhood you old git.

We already have cover for Baines in Oviedo, so we're not going to throw money at another.
 
We are linked with just about everybody at the moment, so I'm starting to wonder whether I might log off until it's all over. Transfer windows are frustrating.

Ha ha. That's whats wrong with these crazy names.

Ah, in the last 16 years.
 
Unfortunately Mike, our lifetime incorporates many other winners ha ha.
 
Pete, I don't have a problem with Mourinho, but it isn't a level playing field in management, and therefore managers should not be compared to their peers, and certainly the work of David Moyes is in itself quite a feat.
 
I'm fairly sure Moyes would win the league if he was at the helm of United or Barcelona. I'm not so sure other managers could have done the work of Moyes though.

I tried to make it look good value for money ha ha.
 
Asda 12.99

Remember ....... this is a site that welcomes fans of all clubs, but it is an Everton fan site first and foremost.
 
As much as you get a buzz from enjoying our club, and that also of other clubs, your emotions are probably not too troubled by whether Everton win or Chelsea win, or whether Fellaini stays here or goes to Chelsea,
 
Everton fans on the other hand support their team with all their heart, and as much as we have a little soft spot for almost 'all' other clubs, as sport fans, we really don't have soft spots for the Sky teams, or the billionaire owned teams, as it is their money and investment which prevents our own club, and many like us from having a fair environment in which to compete.
 
When you think how close we are to breaking into the top 4 places this season, and then have those rich twats attempt to dismantle our team before our eyes, you can imagine we would have little patience for Chelsea fans coming on to our forum winding us up, but at least they would be Chelsea fans, and not European fans who half like them, and half like someboddy else, so they know what it feels like to experience defeat against us, not to mention their own highs and lows.
 
Can you imagine then, how niggly it is, to have a Belgium lad with no roots to our club, telling us how great Fellaini is, and how much better he is than any other player in our team, at the exact same time he is linked with a transfer.
 
Can you also imagine how niggly it is for that Belgium lad to be a Chelsea fan too ?
 
It reminds me of the ship in a force 10 gale, when all are puking their guts out except one guy, who is laughing, and whistling, and loving the splash of the waves.
 
That is why you get negative responses, and that is why you need to be a little bit tactful while all this shit is going on.

Remember ....... this is a site that welcomes fans of all clubs, but it is an Everton fan site first and foremost.
 
As much as you get a buzz from enjoying our club, and that also of other clubs, your emotions are probably not too troubled by whether Everton win or Chelsea win, or whether Fellaini stays here or goes to Chelsea,
 
Everton fans on the other hand support their team with all their heart, and as much as we have a little soft spot for almost 'all' other clubs, as sport fans, we really don't have soft spots for the Sky teams, or the billionaire owned teams, as it is their money and investment which prevents our own club, and many like us from having a fair environment in which to compete.
 
When you think how close we are to breaking into the top 4 places this season, and then have those rich twats attempt to dismantle our team before our eyes, you can imagine we would have little patience for Chelsea fans coming on to our forum winding us up, but at least they would be Chelsea fans, and not European fans who half like them, and half like someboddy else, so they know what it feels like to experience defeat against us, not to mention their own highs and lows.
 
Can you imagine then, how niggly it is, to have a Belgium lad with no roots to our club, telling us how great Fellaini is, and how much better he is than any other player in our team, at the exact same time he is linked with a transfer.
 
Can you also imagine how niggly it is for that Belgium lad to be a Chelsea fan too ?
 
It reminds me of the ship in a force 10 gale, when all are puking their guts out except one guy, who is laughing, and whistling, and loving the splash of the waves.
 
That is why you get negative responses, and that is why you need to be a little bit tactful while all this shit is going on.

Did you say the same regarding Chelsea?

Again, the little veiled digs.
 
Everybody in our team has their own jobs, and the majority of them do their jobs very well. I get fed up of people thinking our team has just 2 players, and that those 2 players are the only ones who perform.
 
Let me tell you that we were finishing in a high league position every year before Fellaini arrived, and we'll do so again if he goes. Individuals do not make teams. Everton play as a team, and that is why we are a good side.
 
Everton developed Fellaini. Fellaini did not develop Everton.

Again, the little veiled digs.
 
Everybody in our team has their own jobs, and the majority of them do their jobs very well. I get fed up of people thinking our team has just 2 players, and that those 2 players are the only ones who perform.
 
Let me tell you that we were finishing in a high league position every year before Fellaini arrived, and we'll do so again if he goes. Individuals do not make teams. Everton play as a team, and that is why we are a good side.
 
Everton developed Fellaini. Fellaini did not develop Everton.

Again, the little veiled digs.
 
Everybody in our team has their own jobs, and the majority of them do their jobs very well. I get fed up of people thinking our team has just 2 players, and that those 2 players are the only ones who perform.
 
Let me tell you that we were finishing in a high league position every year before Fellaini arrived, and we'll do so again if he goes. Individuals do not make teams. Everton play as a team, and that is why we are a good side.
 
Everton developed Fellaini. Fellaini did not develop Everton.

Again, the little veiled digs.
 
Everybody in our team has their own jobs, and the majority of them do their jobs very well. I get fed up of people thinking our team has just 2 players, and that those 2 players are the only ones who perform.
 
Let me tell you that we were finishing in a high league position every year before Fellaini arrived, and we'll do so again if he goes. Individuals do not make teams. Everton play as a team, and that is why we are a good side.
 
Everton developed Fellaini. Fellaini did not develop Everton.

So tough shits for the syndicate ha ha.

It's down to Heitinga to re-gain form, regardless of playing time. He is a squad member, and not a special case. Re-gain form, or sit on the bench; it's an easy enough scenario. The main thing is to take your chance when you get it. We can't be mollycoddling these guys. They're paid an enormous amount to be at the top of their game. You dust off the cobwebs in training, or the reserves, but a matchday is for those who are ready, and not for those who aren't.