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The Odd News Thread


Louis

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21 hours ago, MikeO said:

Need to think about this one...

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-49129982

"March will now spend a significant amount of time in prison [three years with good behaviour?] and will have to live with the consequences of his actions in relation to future employment opportunities."

Or not?

"The prosecution said £860,840 was still missing."

💭 Would you trade three years prison for the best part of £1m? Have to have been well planned and well hidden of course. Interesting.

In an instant. 

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12 hours ago, MikeO said:

You shouldn't laugh but this defence demanded it..

"The jury rejected his claim that he had not been masturbating in his mother's sports car but had been strumming a miniature guitar."

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-59094609

Hang on, he's in trouble because he had a wank in his car and someone walked passed by chance, and thats someone also by chance happened to be a kid?

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27 minutes ago, Matt said:

Hang on, he's in trouble because he had a wank in his car and someone walked passed by chance, and thats someone also by chance happened to be a kid?

If he was in an isolated car park in the dark you'd have a point but it was in a residential street in Belfast in the afternoon, so the chances of people passing by quite high.

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37 minutes ago, Matt said:

What the actual fuck. 

The ridiculous thing is that the "STI" in question is HPV, which virtually everyone on the planet who's sexually active will get at some point, and it almost never causes any problem at all. It can be a factor for some who contract cancer, notably cervical in women and head and neck in men (which is what I had), but in those cases it's actually a good thing to be HPV+ because cancers related to it respond better to treatment than those that aren't, I was never given my HPV status and never asked for it. Michael Douglas famously attributed his cancer to HPV caused by oral sex.

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