Vaunt the Good Vibes

[Hafnia]

On 13/10/2021 at 20:52, Matt said:

1 year no drinking today

Not sure it will continue forever but it's a landmark to be recognised. When I consider where I was 1 year ago (unemployed, suicidal depression, sat with a gash on my head, not knowing how, in hospital) to today where I'm sat in my own home... 

yeah. A good landmark to celebrate.

Reading this for a bit of positivity.... Had surgery over 2 weeks ago.  I took steroid eye drops which I'm on for a while and have felt completely and utterly shit.

Currently on 25mg of sertraline which I've been on for under a week.  

Got to brave this out.  

[Matt]

2 hours ago, Hafnia said:

Reading this for a bit of positivity.... Had surgery over 2 weeks ago.  I took steroid eye drops which I'm on for a while and have felt completely and utterly shit.

Currently on 25mg of sertraline which I've been on for under a week.  

Got to brave this out.  

Best of luck mate 

[MikeO]

19 hours ago, Hafnia said:

Reading this for a bit of positivity.... Had surgery over 2 weeks ago.  I took steroid eye drops which I'm on for a while and have felt completely and utterly shit.

Currently on 25mg of sertraline which I've been on for under a week.  

Got to brave this out.  

What was the surgery Pete (if you don't mind me asking)? I'm sure you've been told that sertraline will take a few weeks to properly kick in but it'll happen, look after yourself in the meantime.

[Hafnia]

7 hours ago, MikeO said:

What was the surgery Pete (if you don't mind me asking)? I'm sure you've been told that sertraline will take a few weeks to properly kick in but it'll happen, look after yourself in the meantime.

Lens replacement as I'm at risk of angle  closure glaucoma and as we age our lenses get thinker in the eye which isn't helpful. 

So I'm on dexamethasone drops..... It could be just a succession of stress events taking its toll but I do think the steroid has impacted my mood. 

I was on sertraline at 27.... For 18 month's, it worked for me but I recall feeling a bit numb on it.  Far better than depressed and anxious though! 

[MikeO]

8 minutes ago, Hafnia said:

Lens replacement as I'm at risk of angle  closure glaucoma and as we age our lenses get thinker in the eye which isn't helpful. 

So I'm on dexamethasone drops..... It could be just a succession of stress events taking its toll but I do think the steroid has impacted my mood. 

I was on sertraline at 27.... For 18 month's, it worked for me but I recall feeling a bit numb on it.  Far better than depressed and anxious though! 

Eye surgery sounds scary to me, as you know I've done a bit of time on the table in the last few years (was actually around this time last year when I got home after the most recent) and I've always had faith in my teams, ops themselves never worried me but around the eyes think I'd be very nervy.

Steroids can do nasty things I know, my dad had to take them for a long time. Wish you well.

[Palfy]

36 minutes ago, MikeO said:

Eye surgery sounds scary to me, as you know I've done a bit of time on the table in the last few years (was actually around this time last year when I got home after the most recent) and I've always had faith in my teams, ops themselves never worried me but around the eyes think I'd be very nervy.

Steroids can do nasty things I know, my dad had to take them for a long time. Wish you well.

Sorry to hear about your problems mate hope everything is going to plan and your back to your old self soon. 

[Palfy]

Just now, Palfy said:

Sorry to hear about your problems mate hope everything is going to plan and your back to your old self soon. 

And you Mike of course but this was meant for Haf

[MikeO]

41 minutes ago, Palfy said:

And you Mike of course but this was meant for Haf

I realised, I'm not in the least bit hurt

[Matt]

Thought I'd let you know that a while ago I got a result in my bloodwork (twice)  showing a high inflammation marker. Anyway, they did a scan on my liver considering my past and results came back today. Apparently my liver function and state of my liver is that of a teenager, everything working normal and no ramifications of darker times. They still don't know what's causing this inflammation marker but considering I'm still suffering this ear and sinus thing 6 months later, next step is to try and address that properly.

15 months sober next week too

[Palfy]

4 hours ago, Matt said:

Thought I'd let you know that a while ago I got a result in my bloodwork (twice)  showing a high inflammation marker. Anyway, they did a scan on my liver considering my past and results came back today. Apparently my liver function and state of my liver is that of a teenager, everything working normal and no ramifications of darker times. They still don't know what's causing this inflammation marker but considering I'm still suffering this ear and sinus thing 6 months later, next step is to try and address that properly.

15 months sober next week too

[Hafnia]

On 14/11/2021 at 17:52, Hafnia said:

Reading this for a bit of positivity.... Had surgery over 2 weeks ago.  I took steroid eye drops which I'm on for a while and have felt completely and utterly shit.

Currently on 25mg of sertraline which I've been on for under a week.  

Got to brave this out.  

think it's important to give an update - at the time of writing the quoted email I was in a bad place, yeah I said I was at the time but I was bad - far worse than I let on..... awful thoughts raging through my head, wishing my life was something you could press the fast forward button on as the thought of "staying like this for the rest of my life" plagued my thinking.

Its not a good place to be at all.  Fortunately I am quite honest about things and broke down to my wife several times and got myself seen by a doctor.   What was the cause???  steroid drops?  grief having lost two people very close to me in relatively quick succession, lockdown and anxiety of covid, worrying about my children?  or a mix of all the above or just my brain worrying about my eye operation and risk factors whilst being unable to read things without going dizzy etc.

Either way - it doesn't matter! - whether Everton losing sends you into the depths of despair or whether you witnessed an horrific event and have PTSD - when your brain isn't right you need help.    If you think your brain isn't in its best place - then it pretty much isn't, don't second guess it and think you just need a holiday or a drink.  There is a tendancy for people to hide it from others and themselves.

Pride, Masculinity, Strength,bravery???  I'm sure people who are brought up to think that "manning up" is some sort of admirable trait have doubts about getting help - but guess what, there is nothing braver than admitting you have something going on in your head which is not right and seeking help.  A community NHS worker who I spoke about my post-op anxiety and depression to - told me to take a "chill pill".....  still in two minds about reaching out to her and explaining how her words came across.

I spoke to a doctor who prescribed me sertraline - took about two weeks to kick in.  Ironically I felt worse in the mornings on them and really sedated in the afternoon and then eventually had a happy medium.  There's a few side effects but nothing worse than the feelings you have which lead you to take them,...... one nice side effect is you last longer in the sack!

I was on the sertraline for around 10 weeks, my eyes had recovered enough for me to plan my "natural cure" - which was the gym.  I discussed with the doctor and we brought myself down from 50mg to 25mg to 0 over a period of 4 weeks.  It is critical that antidepressants are not stopped abruptly.  The other thing I did was pray - I'm not here to push religion on anyone - I'm a Roman Catholic and have faith but lets say I've not been consistent in my life with prayer and attending mass.   Whether you are religious or not - whether you use prayer or another means of taking your mind into a place where you try and focus on wanting to be better, thinking of others, having some reflection - it is worth trying.  For me I found it a strong tool to help me and strengthened my faith and made me realise we all have a purpose and we need to help each other.

 

As I type here today I feel loads better - loads.  I am doing the gym which helps, I have a sauna after, I am sleeping better, eating shite but mixing it with very healthy days.  

 

My message is - I hope you don't feel like I did, if you have done you know what I am talking about. If you haven't just be aware that help is out there - do not try and bottle it up.  It will pass but you need to get help in making it pass. x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[MikeO]

19 minutes ago, Hafnia said:

think it's important to give an update - at the time of writing the quoted email I was in a bad place, yeah I said I was at the time but I was bad - far worse than I let on..... awful thoughts raging through my head, wishing my life was something you could press the fast forward button on as the thought of "staying like this for the rest of my life" plagued my thinking.

Its not a good place to be at all.  Fortunately I am quite honest about things and broke down to my wife several times and got myself seen by a doctor.   What was the cause???  steroid drops?  grief having lost two people very close to me in relatively quick succession, lockdown and anxiety of covid, worrying about my children?  or a mix of all the above or just my brain worrying about my eye operation and risk factors whilst being unable to read things without going dizzy etc.

Either way - it doesn't matter! - whether Everton losing sends you into the depths of despair or whether you witnessed an horrific event and have PTSD - when your brain isn't right you need help.    If you think your brain isn't in its best place - then it pretty much isn't, don't second guess it and think you just need a holiday or a drink.  There is a tendancy for people to hide it from others and themselves.

Pride, Masculinity, Strength,bravery???  I'm sure people who are brought up to think that "manning up" is some sort of admirable trait have doubts about getting help - but guess what, there is nothing braver than admitting you have something going on in your head which is not right and seeking help.  A community NHS worker who I spoke about my post-op anxiety and depression to - told me to take a "chill pill".....  still in two minds about reaching out to her and explaining how her words came across.

I spoke to a doctor who prescribed me sertraline - took about two weeks to kick in.  Ironically I felt worse in the mornings on them and really sedated in the afternoon and then eventually had a happy medium.  There's a few side effects but nothing worse than the feelings you have which lead you to take them,...... one nice side effect is you last longer in the sack!

I was on the sertraline for around 10 weeks, my eyes had recovered enough for me to plan my "natural cure" - which was the gym.  I discussed with the doctor and we brought myself down from 50mg to 25mg to 0 over a period of 4 weeks.  It is critical that antidepressants are not stopped abruptly.  The other thing I did was pray - I'm not here to push religion on anyone - I'm a Roman Catholic and have faith but lets say I've not been consistent in my life with prayer and attending mass.   Whether you are religious or not - whether you use prayer or another means of taking your mind into a place where you try and focus on wanting to be better, thinking of others, having some reflection - it is worth trying.  For me I found it a strong tool to help me and strengthened my faith and made me realise we all have a purpose and we need to help each other.

 

As I type here today I feel loads better - loads.  I am doing the gym which helps, I have a sauna after, I am sleeping better, eating shite but mixing it with very healthy days.  

 

My message is - I hope you don't feel like I did, if you have done you know what I am talking about. If you haven't just be aware that help is out there - do not try and bottle it up.  It will pass but you need to get help in making it pass. x

Wise words, been down similar roads myself, great that you're on the mend.

[Hafnia]

purchase alert:- coffee lovers.

Bought a sage bambino and sage coffee grinder.......... £350 which is £150 off the RRP.  Amazing.

 

I was using a nespresso for a week and by the time I used up the free pods realised it would cost a fortune to keep me in caffeine.

Any coffee lovers in here?  Amazing bit of kit.  The steam wand makes amazing milk too so I can do lattes etc.

 

 

[MikeO]

19 minutes ago, Hafnia said:

Any coffee lovers in here?  Amazing bit of kit.  The steam wand makes amazing milk too so I can do lattes etc.

Used to love an espresso or a Greek coffee; not had one since 2013 though, can't manage any hot drink at all.

[Palfy]

42 minutes ago, Hafnia said:

purchase alert:- coffee lovers.

Bought a sage bambino and sage coffee grinder.......... £350 which is £150 off the RRP.  Amazing.

 

I was using a nespresso for a week and by the time I used up the free pods realised it would cost a fortune to keep me in caffeine.

Any coffee lovers in here?  Amazing bit of kit.  The steam wand makes amazing milk too so I can do lattes etc.

 

 

I only drink coffee mate I don’t like tea never have, I have Miele built in coffee maker grinds the beans, high pressure steam for heating and frothing milk and dispenses hot water for making tea for the ladies

[Palfy]

31 minutes ago, MikeO said:

Used to love an espresso or a Greek coffee; not had one since 2013 though, can't manage any hot drink at all.

That’s a shame mate can you see a time when that might change?

[Hafnia]

38 minutes ago, MikeO said:

Used to love an espresso or a Greek coffee; not had one since 2013 though, can't manage any hot drink at all.

Sorry to hear that. Not really got into espresso… too short a drink for me. Not sure what the etiquette is with it…. I’m sure I will nail one before golf tomorrow 

[MikeO]

31 minutes ago, Palfy said:

That’s a shame mate can you see a time when that might change?

No, permanent now; coffee and walnut cake is the closest I get, but it's not a bad substitute

[Matt]

On 29/04/2022 at 16:05, Hafnia said:

Sorry to hear that. Not really got into espresso… too short a drink for me. Not sure what the etiquette is with it…. I’m sure I will nail one before golf tomorrow 

I just make a mug of it

Absolutely love coffee, my last vice. Never got time to invest in making good coffee anymore, work is just too busy. So I resorted to the cheapest instant I can find and double dose it, does the trick for me.

Got a single one of these ("single", it's supposed to be 2 cups), but just saw there's a 10 cup version so might get that;

Bialetti New Venus Italian Coffee Maker (Induction), Stainless Steel, Silver https://smile.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07ZL4WWWR/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_Z31GBV1KME9T8KZC5R7Y

 

 

[Hafnia]

1 hour ago, Matt said:

I just make a mug of it

Absolutely love coffee, my last vice. Never got time to invest in making good coffee anymore, work is just too busy. So I resorted to the cheapest instant I can find and double dose it, does the trick for me.

Got a single one of these ("single", it's supposed to be 2 cups), but just saw there's a 10 cup version so might get that;

Bialetti New Venus Italian Coffee Maker (Induction), Stainless Steel, Silver https://smile.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07ZL4WWWR/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_Z31GBV1KME9T8KZC5R7Y

 

 

It’s funny, I always thought caffeine gave me anxiety…… it did when I was hungover.  Go figure!

yeah coffee is my drug now, until they open cannabis cafes in this country it will be my social drug. 

[dunlopp9987]

I figured this would be the best place to put this, as I will need all the good vibes I can summon.

Running my first Tough Mudder on Saturday at 8am. 15k with most (if not all) of the obstacles in the link below.

If you don't hear from me ever again, just assume they had to carry my lifeless corpse off the course

https://toughmudder.com/obstacles/

[Hafnia]

7 hours ago, dunlopp9987 said:

I figured this would be the best place to put this, as I will need all the good vibes I can summon.

Running my first Tough Mudder on Saturday at 8am. 15k with most (if not all) of the obstacles in the link below.

If you don't hear from me ever again, just assume they had to carry my lifeless corpse off the course

https://toughmudder.com/obstacles/

Good luck mate 

[Hafnia]

https://www.guitarguitar.co.uk/product/201202364675025--fender-75th-anniversary-stratocaster-diamond-anniversary
 

I’ve seen guitars posted on here before. This looks a good deal. Not sure about colour. 

[MikeO]

10 hours ago, dunlopp9987 said:

I figured this would be the best place to put this, as I will need all the good vibes I can summon.

Running my first Tough Mudder on Saturday at 8am. 15k with most (if not all) of the obstacles in the link below.

If you don't hear from me ever again, just assume they had to carry my lifeless corpse off the course

https://toughmudder.com/obstacles/

Insanity.

3 hours ago, Hafnia said:

https://www.guitarguitar.co.uk/product/201202364675025--fender-75th-anniversary-stratocaster-diamond-anniversary
 

I’ve seen guitars posted on here before. This looks a good deal. Not sure about colour. 

The one obvious guitar model missing from my collection is a Strat....I'm just not a fan.

[Hafnia]

7 minutes ago, MikeO said:

Insanity.

The one obvious guitar model missing from my collection is a Strat....I'm just not a fan.

So…. You gonna get it then?  Hendrix, Clapton, Knopfler…..  Mike o?

[Matt]

13 minutes ago, MikeO said:

Insanity.

The one obvious guitar model missing from my collection is a Strat....I'm just not a fan.

Philistine 

[MikeO]

2 hours ago, Hafnia said:

So…. You gonna get it then?  Hendrix, Clapton, Knopfler…..  Mike o?

Nope, they just have no appeal to me. Looking at a Les Paul Junior next

[MikeO]

On 07/07/2022 at 14:54, MikeO said:

Nope, they just have no appeal to me. Looking at a Les Paul Junior next

Bought it, number sixteen

[Hafnia]

2 hours ago, MikeO said:

Bought it, number sixteen

Nice looking guitar. Do they have different sounds? 

[MikeO]

11 hours ago, Hafnia said:

Nice looking guitar. Do they have different sounds? 

You can get very different sounds on most guitars using different pick-up combinations/tones/amp channels/effects, but this only has one set of pick-ups so going to be interesting to play with. 

Picking it up later in the week, the guy who I bought it off is isolating with covid