Dele

[Palfy]

20 minutes ago, Gwlad said:

I agree with your post Palfy. Putting on the face of someone who doesn't have a care in the world is often the default when, as you rightly say, inside you are a mess. I have only told my immediate family who were instrumental in my getting the help I needed and two very close friends. Even my brother doesn't know.

I’ve felt like this for over 30 years and haven’t opened up to anyone until now, and that’s because this Dele thread has given the courage to do so, because I can see I’m not alone and feel I won’t be judged. Before I can open up to those who mean the most to me I have a lot of values in my life that I need to change because they hold me back from opening up, some may see it as stubbornness and there may be a little of that, but I come from a time and place where I’ve been institutionalised and led into a situation that men just get on with it, how times have changed since I grew up, this dinosaur is learning even if slower than most. 

[Palfy]

Thanks forgiving me this opportunity to talk I don’t usually have very much to say as you all know but we now need to try and lighten the mood to lift our spirit's, or I can see myself drinking my Morphine straight from the bottle very soon

[Matt]

1 hour ago, Palfy said:

Dele speaking out about his troubles has had a very positive effect on TT members, who have taken the opportunity to talk freely about their own struggles, this can only be a positive thing for those opening up about their struggles and for those who didn’t understand the challenges and difficulties people with mental health issues face on a daily basis. I for one try to hide my inner feelings and demons with humour and being upbeat and positive as much as I can, I also focus on my children and grandchildren to the extent I start to take over and impose on them believing I’m helping, when the reality is I’m using them so I don’t have to concentrate on me. I believe sleep deprivation has become my worst enemy going to bed isn’t an opportunity for me to get a good nights sleep and wake up feeling refreshed and ready for the next day, for me it’s become time for questioning myself and constantly going over my own thoughts and feelings, where I constantly doubt myself. From the outside to my family and friends happy and successful in life which I am if you just look at what you see, but on the inside I’m a mess is the best way I can describe it, the true meaning of don’t judge a book by it’s cover I feel sums me up quite adequately. 
I’m staring at the screen wrestling with post or delete and that I believe is because my hardest decisions in life are the decisions about myself. So here goes with an attitude of nothing ventured nothing gained because that’s how I roll. 

Sleep debt / imbalance is so rarely appreciated for how dangerous it is. I would suggest trying to find a less addictive form of medication as soon as you're able mate. 

Good on ya for sharing

[Palfy]

7 minutes ago, Matt said:

Sleep debt / imbalance is so rarely appreciated for how dangerous it is. I would suggest trying to find a less addictive form of medication as soon as you're able mate. 

Good on ya for sharing

Thanks mate. 

[Bailey]

20 hours ago, MikeO said:

I think the causes of depression can be (on the face of them) fairly insignificant or demonstrably major.

End result is the same for the person affected. No badges for having a better "excuse".

I couldn't agree with this more and something I have come to appreciate as I have aged.

Its all about an individuals perception and that can vary from person to person but also within a person too. 

 

[Cornish Steve]

7 hours ago, Matt said:

Sleep debt / imbalance is so rarely appreciated for how dangerous it is. I would suggest trying to find a less addictive form of medication as soon as you're able mate. 

Good on ya for sharing

I can highly recommend the book 'Why we sleep' by Matthew Walker. It shatters many misconceptions and suggests many good ideas.

I can remember much of the book, but one example reveals the importance of sleep. Every year, the world participates in a huge research project related to sleep: It's called switching between Standard Time and Summer Time. In the spring, when we lose an hour of sleep, the number of heart attacks increases significantly; in the autumn, when we gain an hour of sleep, the number of heart attacks drops significantly.

[StevO]

3 minutes ago, Cornish Steve said:

I can highly recommend the book 'Why we sleep' by Matthew Walker. It shatters many misconceptions and suggests many good ideas.

I can remember much of the book, but one example reveals the importance of sleep. Every year, the world participates in a huge research project related to sleep: It's called switching from Standard Time to Summer Time. In the spring, when we lose an hour of sleep, the number of heart attacks increases significantly; in the autumn, when we gain an hour of sleep, the number of heart attacks drops significantly.

I knew sleep was important but that is some scary information! As I’m sat here knackered thinking I should sleep, but know full well I’ll be awake for a couple of hours. 

[Cornish Steve]

19 hours ago, StevO said:

I knew sleep was important but that is some scary information! As I’m sat here knackered thinking I should sleep, but know full well I’ll be awake for a couple of hours. 

Walker provides so much useful information about the science of sleep. For example, alcohol is a major reason for sleeplessness. Most sleep medicines cause more harm than good.

Another thing I remember is that, for the first four hours of sleep, our brain moves everything from short-term memory to long-term memory. If we don't sleep four hours, it interrupts that process. After that, the brain spends time establishing links between those new memories and existing ones. This is why there's very little benefit to students staying up all night before an important exam, since what they're studying never makes it to their long-term memory. Instead, they should sleep at least eight hours.

Thinking on Shukes' comment about combating sleeplessness, I don't recall much of what Walker wrote, but I do remember the importance of routine. If we sleep from 11 to 7 every weekday, for example, we should sleep 11 to 7 at weekends as well. Sleep patterns are important.

[duncanmckenzieismagic]

https://www.birminghamworld.uk/sport/football/west-brom/transfer-news-west-brom-birmingham-city-red-alert-everton-loan-dele-alli-4226778

[Matt]

I'd be really annoyed if we didn't give him a go

[Palfy]

32 minutes ago, Matt said:

I'd be really annoyed if we didn't give him a go

Even if he isn’t doing the business or catching the eye in training. And again could be another player who isn’t happy playing in the Dyche style, or can’t make the changes required that Dyche wants from his players. Or it maybe just another bullshit story. 

[Matt]

53 minutes ago, Palfy said:

Even if he isn’t doing the business or catching the eye in training. And again could be another player who isn’t happy playing in the Dyche style, or can’t make the changes required that Dyche wants from his players. Or it maybe just another bullshit story. 

Well no, if he doesn't show improvement he should be moved on. But lumping him out again won't help him without giving him a chance won't help him or us. 

[Palfy]

7 minutes ago, Matt said:

Well no, if he doesn't show improvement he should be moved on. But lumping him out again won't help him without giving him a chance won't help him or us. 

It will be interesting to see if he plays any part in our upcoming friendlies, that will give us a better indication on his future. I think the fans also deserve to see if he has moved in the right direction since we last saw him kick a ball for us, otherwise I for one will feel betrayed after all the years of talking about Dele as a player and a person, then to just let him go without being able to judge if right or wrong in football terms only. 

[Fosse Captain]

23 minutes ago, Matt said:

Well no, if he doesn't show improvement he should be moved on. But lumping him out again won't help him without giving him a chance won't help him or us. 

Agreed. Want him to be given a chance. 
If he's not performing than obviously move him on, but to say 'We're here for you..........but don't want want you' wouldn't sit right with me.
But I'm no expert on the issues he's suffering with, so don't know how best to help him 
I'd prefer us to back him and at least let him try and perform in training / friendlies 

Either way, I was never anti-dele, he's a superb player who improves us. But that's not the main focus now, I just hope he can get the help he needs to move forwards in his life. Football is a by-product of him being 'happy' again 

[Bailey]

He gets a chance in training everyday. If he isn't up to the level we need him to be, then he needs to move on, in the best interests of both parties.

[Shukes]

Moving him on will he discussed with him. He may feel that going on loan and getting regular game time may be the best move for him at this stage. 
He is being looked after by the club, he said so himself.

Don't fall into the trap of making every club decision to be a disaster. Leave that to the press.

[Wall Writer]

I do get the impression that the club and Dyche have tried to treat him well; helping him with his recovery and giving him the patience and time he needs.

The interview he did recently obviously shed a lot of light on what was going on, and he seemed to really be wanting to get back to his best.

I do hope that he can do that, and it would be great to see him do that that with us, because there is a very good player in there somewhere.

I would like to think that he will be given a chance here to show what he can do. But if the club and the player decide that a loan spell to the Championship would be better for his recovery, then I suppose you can't argue with that.

Depression, addiction, trauma... these are not things that you just wake up one day and are free from. It takes time to heal. 

Whatever happens he'll need support to get back to fulfilling his potential, but I'm not going to lie; I would love that potential to be fulfilled in an Everton shirt with the the full support of the club and the fans behind him.

[barryj]

The stumbling block in regards to Dele playing for the club for a meaningful time this season is the way we’ve structured the deal. 

[Palfy]

On 21/07/2023 at 14:35, Wall Writer said:

I do get the impression that the club and Dyche have tried to treat him well; helping him with his recovery and giving him the patience and time he needs.

The interview he did recently obviously shed a lot of light on what was going on, and he seemed to really be wanting to get back to his best.

I do hope that he can do that, and it would be great to see him do that that with us, because there is a very good player in there somewhere.

I would like to think that he will be given a chance here to show what he can do. But if the club and the player decide that a loan spell to the Championship would be better for his recovery, then I suppose you can't argue with that.

Depression, addiction, trauma... these are not things that you just wake up one day and are free from. It takes time to heal. 

Whatever happens he'll need support to get back to fulfilling his potential, but I'm not going to lie; I would love that potential to be fulfilled in an Everton shirt with the the full support of the club and the fans behind him.

I think we would all like to see him come good again and more so in an Everton shirt. The problem being are we a club who can financially cover his costs for a season with potentially seeing no return on the pitch, and are we as a squad able to name a player that may not contribute anything football wise to the team, some tough decisions a head for Dele and the club on this but either way I hope what ever comes along is the right decision for both parties. 

[RuffRob]

https://www-dailymail-co-uk.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-12373697/amp/Delighted-Dele-Alli-buzzes-alongside-team-mates-pre-season-training-steps-preparations-play.html?amp_gsa=1&amp_js_v=a9&usqp=mq331AQGsAEggAID#amp_tf=From %1%24s&aoh=16912334166391&csi=0&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&ampshare=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.dailymail.co.uk%2Fsport%2Ffootball%2Farticle-12373697%2FDelighted-Dele-Alli-buzzes-alongside-team-mates-pre-season-training-steps-preparations-play.html

 

Great to see Dele with such a great smile on his face. 

Hopefully, his head is in a much better place now. They say a problem shared is a problem halved, so with a bit of luck this past couple on months has been a major turning point in his life.

Being given a squad number that has meaning to him is just one more little thing that should give the lad confidence and feel wanted and help keep him in a better place.

[duncanmckenzieismagic]

https://www.liverpoolworld.uk/sport/football/everton/dele-alli-injury-timeframe-outlined-as-everton-update-given-4245122

[StevO]

I’m pretty certain Dyche is just trying to keep the pressure off Dele and keep the media speculation to a minimum. 

[duncanmckenzieismagic]

 

[Romey 1878]

https://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/everton-plans-dele-talks-tottenham-27767078

[Matt]

1 hour ago, Romey 1878 said:

https://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/everton-plans-dele-talks-tottenham-27767078

Man that sucks for him. In February I thought I'd recovered from my groin strain and decided to play racketball. 45 mins in, all good then twang, abductor and adductor nearly snapped. Mentally a kick in the crotch too.

[Hafnia]

You would like to think that spurs would understand that as a club we would pay money for him if the situation allowed, however the reality is far different.  
 

Yeah spurs aren’t a charity but ffs they had a player who was going through shit and they had him getting his arse handed to him by mourinho on the Amazon doc. imagine how he felt, then they get rid, and create a deal that really isn’t going to work given current circumstances.

 

They have a responsibility to their ex player who gave them good service and was given sleeping tablets to recover from games that he got addicted to. 

[Wall Writer]

Is he anywhere near fit? Thought he had a slight setback, but still doesn’t seem to be anywhere near the team.

[Palfy]

3 hours ago, Hafnia said:

You would like to think that spurs would understand that as a club we would pay money for him if the situation allowed, however the reality is far different.  
 

Yeah spurs aren’t a charity but ffs they had a player who was going through shit and they had him getting his arse handed to him by mourinho on the Amazon doc. imagine how he felt, then they get rid, and create a deal that really isn’t going to work given current circumstances.

 

They have a responsibility to their ex player who gave them good service and was given sleeping tablets to recover from games that he got addicted to. 

They can’t be held responsible for us signing a player that doesn’t have what’s required mentally or physically, I’m sure no gun was put to our head and if you go back to his signing nearly all were praising Brands for a great deal. We need to stop acting like victims and face up to our poor decisions and get over it and move on, or are we going to be shit and whinges at the same time. For me I don’t see him playing for us this season with any regularity he’s unfortunately been a waste of money to a club that can’t afford it, the reality is he has been a very poor signing and not the good one we thought we were getting. 

[Haiku]

I doubt he'll make a breakthrough. He's consistently underperformed for many years. There's no turning point in sight for him, especially in the Premier League. He should consider playing in a less demanding league, away from the spotlight to start enjoying football again.

[c1982]

5 hours ago, Haiku said:

I doubt he'll make a breakthrough. He's consistently underperformed for many years. 

He’s come out and explained why… maybe, with ‘everything’ out in the open, he can regain what he had. At 100%, he was one of the best in the world so he’s worth a bit of patience and support at least!